Self-Actualization?

A musician must make music, an artist must paint, a poet must write… they have the desire to become more and more what they are, to become everything that they are capable of becoming. When a man perceives this strong desire, he aims for self-actualization. Generally, people certainly attain the needs of actualization after they fulfill the psychological needs, the safety needs, the belongingness and love needs, and esteem needs, orderly. Some successful people, however, are competent to reach
the level of self-actualization without climbing the pyramid in the prescribed order. I believe that fulfillment of the first four deficit needs, whether in the prescribed order or not, is essential before a man moves on to the self-actualization.

When coming to this thought, I AM an implacable enemy of myself. It's so hard to compete with myself. I always think.... how much closer I can approach this asceticism.

How close I am...? I thought I was on the way of making it real - keep learning, achieving next level, extending my capability, getting appreciation and recognization... and most important is doing something I love and meeting people who appreciate me, as a musician, a creator, and a person.

I always have this thought, since I wanted to leave KL for better opportunities. Finally, I wrote it down... a reminder for myself, and a thought to share with you.

But now, I lost a big part that I've achieved before I came this long way. I just don't know how to move on... without you.